Java with Jennifer Journal

October 2011 Taste This!

What I Am In To Lately

The highlight of October was being in Lynchburg, Virginia as one of the speakers for Extraordinary Women!   I loved being there because I got to be with my friends, Lysa TerKeurst, Donna VanLiere, Julie Clinton, Carol Kent and Michael O'Brien.  I also got to meet a beautiful woman whose music I love hearing on the radio.  Meredith Andrews is an incredible singer/songwriter, but even more impressive is her beautiful heart.  Guess who else I got to meet?  I will give you some hints.  She's prettier than a pit bull wearing lipstick, she is a hockey mom who shoots game, and she was the former PTA president who became Governor of Alaska....yep, Sarah Palin!  I was so impressed by her genuine, engaging personality.  She is a passionate woman who really is fully present wherever she is.  And, can I just say, her shoes were to die for!  When I complimented her on them, she told me they were Bristol's.  

Well, between writing and traveling, I've been either too busy or too brain weary to read a new book this month.  But, I never miss my daily infusion of inspiration from A Slice of Infinity.  It's a daily email essay from Ravi Zacharius International Ministries.  It always makes me think.  There are several contributing writers, but my very favorite is Jill Carattini.  You simply must give it a taste test.  It's free and will come right in to your inbox.


Because no month would really be a good one without chocolate, I'll give you a taste of the yummy kind I tried this month--a box of Godiva Dark Chocolate Dipped Pretzels!  They were the perfect combo of salt and sweet, and the chocolate was smooth.  They were delicious, but I am sure they're expensive.  It was a gift.  Candy is sweeter when it's free!   Ha!

Since fall is here and winter is inching up in line behind her, I found the best lip balm ever for chapped lips.  You may not need it, but with all the air travel, my lips are constantly so dry.  It's called Rosebud Perfume Co. Lip Balm.  It also comes in mint and strawberry.   I love it because it hydrates and moisturizes, and it has a non-sticky or waxy finish.    Believe me, I have tried all sorts and this one is definitely the best!  I got mine at Sephora and it was around $7- and worth every penny!  My lips don't hurt when I smile now ...and when you eat as many dark chocolate pretzels as I did, you just gotta smile!

So, give these things a taste test:

1.  Extraordinary Women
2.  A Slice of Infinity
3.  Godiva Dark Chocolate Dipped Pretzels
4.  Rosebud Perfume Co. Lip Balm

October 2011 Fresh Grounded Thoughts

What God Has Been Teaching Me Lately 

Put On Your Mask First         

Over my years of air travel, I've accumulated well over 100,000 miles.  And although those miles have taken me to lots of different places, there is one thing all those airlines and flight attendants have in common--the safety briefings!
 
Some flight attendants announce the safety instructions with perfect diction and drama. Some mumble their way through the five minute predictable discourse.  And, some drone on so long that it makes me wish for a power outage so those little red lights would illuminate the floor leading to an emergency exit so I could get out of there!  

I know the job of informing passengers is important, I just think it's humorous how many different presentation styles there are!  But, no matter the style or script, the flight attendant always instructs you to "put on your mask first before assisting the passenger next to you."  

If there is a sudden change in pressure, oxygen masks will drop from the compartment above you.  Each passenger is instructed how to pull it toward you, place it over your nose and mouth and strap it on.  You are told to put on your mask first because if you try to help someone else get their mask on while you are gasping for air and turning blue, you won't be any help at all!  

It isn't selfish or self-serving to "put on your mask first."  Rather, it is wise stewardship of your energy and abilities.  The same applies to our lives.  If we never put on our own mask first, we will peter out from trying to help others.  Mother Theresa once said, "To keep a lamp burning we have to keep putting oil in it."

We must pay attention to our needs so we will be equipped to meet the needs of others.  So, what is your oxygen mask?  What is it in your life that you need to pay attention to?  Is it rest?  If you're exhausted, you can't serve your family like you want to.  You will just become cranky or run down, primed for illness and frustration.  Is the oxygen mask you need exercise?  When we neglect to take care of our bodies so they become weak or overweight, we limit ourselves to how and when we can be involved with helping others.  It isn't selfish to take care of yourself.  Taking time each day to take a walk, do some Pilates with a video or take an aerobics class at a gym will give you renewed strength and interest in giving to others.  Maybe your oxygen mask is solitude.  We all need time alone just to think, pray and breathe.  If we neglect carving out time to regroup and connect with God, we will be empty when it's time to give to others.  

The flight attendant always precedes his or her instruction with, "In the unlikely event of an emergency...."  But, here's the way I see it--emergencies aren't unlikely at all!  We are often called to put on someone's mask.  Emergencies are as predictable as the delays at the airport!  So, if we begin each day with the habit of putting on our masks first, we will be more equipped to fasten on others' masks when they need it most.  

Take care of yourself, sister.  You are the best qualified to do so.  Discover what your "oxygen mask" is--you may have several--and strap it on each day!  You can't minister to others if you're gasping for air!

Well, that's what's been percolating in me lately. 

October 2011 Spill the Beans

You Ask It, I'll Answer It  

Question:

My husband and I started dating back in our teens and we recently married.  For me, it was more for security than love, and I find myself always trying to change him.  I have been listening to Family Life and this has really helped me spiritually.  It has made me realize the things I should have done before I ever married, like praying for the right mate and waiting on God to send him.  Family Life talks about people who have problems and fall out of love, but they were soul mates when they married. Eventually they remember why they married and work it out.  But what about people in my situation who did not pray, were not in love and married for the wrong reasons?  How or can it even work if I didn't marry the right person?  How do you love and accept the person completely as God does?  I do understand all marriages will have issues, but should acceptance be one of them?  I appreciate your help and time.
 
Sincerely,
Toni   

 

Answer:

Oh girl - what a spot you are in!  When I have hard situations as you described, I don't seek answers right away.  Rather, I ask questions.  So, before I even attempt to answer your question, can I ask you some questions?  Don't tell me your answers.  Just discuss them with God.  

Do you want to be totally accepted by your husband?  If so, why would you not be willing to accept him?  How would you feel if your husband told you he never loved you and married you for all the wrong reasons?  What do you value more -- your happiness or your personal holiness?

I ask hard questions because you asked some serious ones.  Here's what I know -- you are seeking and hurting.  God wants to be found in your seeking.  Sometimes we think we are seeking answers or relief, but in our deepest heart, we are really seeking God's peace.  His peace is never found on the path of disobedience.  He wants to grant you peace because He loves you.  But, He grants peace as we walk in His will.  

I will just finish with a few thoughts and you can ask God what may apply to you.  Some cultures, like ours, marry who they think they love.  Other cultures eventually love who they marry.  It is possible for you to love the one you have married.  And, sister, if you married him, he is the right one.  He became that the day you said, "I do."  

Thanks for being so brave and reaching out with your honest questions. I admire you.  If you haven't already, find a Christian counselor who can really help you process this. Sometimes the best treasures are found in the deepest pits.  Don't give up too soon.  

Bless you,
Jennifer
 
And now the beans are officially spilled.