What God Has Been Teaching Me Lately
Logic and Wonder
While sitting at a table in a coffee shop, I overheard an animated discussion about C.S. Lewis around the table next to me. One obvious opponent of Christianity was speaking of the movie Shadowlands, which depicts part of C.S. Lewis' life story. My ears perked as the young man confidently proclaimed that Lewis came to faith in Christ solely because his wife developed cancer, and the accompanying deep suffering and grief drew him to faith out of desperation. Perhaps the movie misrepresented Lewis' initial draw towards Christ, or maybe the young man misinterpreted it, but nothing could be further from truth. Suffering did not draw C.S. Lewis to Christ--rather, suffering tested his faith and eventually confirmed what he believed.
Faith for C.S. Lewis was found years before his marriage, years before his wife's struggle with cancer, and years before his battle with loss. Faith was found at the intersection of logic and wonder. Lewis came to faith in Christ at age 29 as he rode in his brother's motorcycle sidecar to Whipsnade Zoo. There was no deep discussion about Christianity on that ride with his brother, no Christian radio playing in the background, no Bible in C.S. Lewis' hands. He was simply drawn, and he described it later this way: "When we set out, I did not believe that Jesus Christ is the Son of God, and when we reached the zoo I did. Yet I had not exactly spent the journey in thought. Nor in great emotion. Emotional, perhaps, is the last word we can apply to some of the most important events. It was more like when a man, after a long sleep, still lying motionless in bed, becomes aware that he is now awake."
His sensitivity to what happened on the motorcycle was undoubtedly prompted by conversations with his friends J.R.R. Tolkien and Hugo Dyson just a few nights earlier. The friends had all discussed metaphor and myth, both of which were of particular interest to Lewis. His two friends had explained that the pagans' myths of dying and resurrecting gods do not disprove Christianity. Instead, they revealed that even the pagans glimpsed a sliver of truth, which would be realized in the incarnation. In other words, their myths were simply echoes and shadows of truth.
Attraction to mystery, fantasy, and wonder made Lewis seek what he could not understand, and his unmet longings for what could not be found in this world made him desire another world. His deepest joy was experienced in these unmet longings. That joy made him aware--through logic and wonder--that something beyond him must exist. It prompted him to know there was something more real than what he knew and something infinitely satisfying even in the thirst. It was as if the longings, the myths, the "good dreams" drew him to a logical belief in Christ. He said, "If I find in myself a desire which no experience in this world can satisfy, the most probable explanation is that I was made for another world."
The result of our conversion is also like a man who has been asleep, who realizes he is fully awake eternally, awake completely, awake to recognize truth and be captivated by the wonder of it. The logic of the gospel compels us; the mystery and wonder of the gospel attracts us.
I want millions of moments in this life where logic and wonder intersect. I yearn to live in the place where my wonder doesn't destroy my logic, and my logic initiates wonder. I want logic and wonder to collide daily in my spirit to spring forth renewed faith and reverence.
C.S. Lewis later wrote, "I believe in Christianity as I believe that the sun has risen, not only because I see it, but because, by it, I see everything else."
Therein lies the logic; therein begs the wonder.
Well, that's what's been percolating in me lately!
