Java with Jennifer Journal

May 2012 Taste This!

What I Am In To Lately

Bishop Henry Hearns is now one of my heroes! He is Mayor Emeritus of Lancaster, California and I met him when I spoke at The Mayor's Prayer Breakfast on the National Day of Prayer. He told me so many compelling stories of being a young black man in America and experiencing such hardship and reward leading up to and during the Civil Rights Movement. I could have spent hours listening to him! I am grateful I am literally color blind, and I am even more grateful that my heart can't see color either. I can't wait to spend eternity with him and hear more about his life. He was such a gracious, gentle and wise man.

From California, I flew to Pennsylvania. The Mothers and Others Event was spectacular! I love how those women reach out to their community with the love of Christ.

As soon as I returned from that trip, wedding bells were ringing! (photos) Family arrived and a million unexpected details showed up, too. You know how that goes!  But, truly, it was an enchanting, inspiring wedding. Caroline was a beautiful bride and Clayton was a handsome, giddy groom!  

Michael O'Brien, our precious friend, sang at the wedding and every woman there was wishing they wore waterproof mascara! My dad performed the ceremony and there was not a dry eye in the chapel.  

Last thing...I mentioned Phil and I took dance lessons so we could boogie-woogie at the reception. Well, boogie-woogie we did not, but we did enjoy a few slow dances. The highlight for me, though, was dancing with Clayton to "What a Wonderful World."  (Video) 

I also told you last month I would show you pics of the rehearsal dinner.  The centerpieces turned out so well. I was grateful to friends who set it all up for me while I was at the rehearsal. So, check out these pictures. Oh, I didn't use place cards. Instead, I told folks to sit where they recognized a picture.  We had such a sweet time.  

Okay, so that wasn't the last thing!  The after-wedding brunch at my home was so special because all of our family attended - both Phil's and mine. We had Summer Vegetable Strata, Sausage Apple Strata,
French Toast Casserole and bacon-wrapped dates. Yum! The big hit was the Cappuccino Punch. Oh, sister, worth every calorie!

The more I write, the more I realize I am gushing! But, indulge one last thing please. Connor, our youngest son, who is 13, was the best man.  Phil and I had no idea what he would say at the reception when called to do his toast. We knew he hadn't rehearsed or written notes. So, when he began, our jaws dropped...wanna see why? Adorable!

Well friend, thanks for hearing all my wedding chat.  

Give these things a taste test:

1.  Sit down with someone of a different generation or race and listen to their stories. You will be enriched and they will be blessed by your interest.  
2.  Cappucino Punch
3.  Dance with someone you love.

May 2012 Fresh Grounded Thoughts

What God Has Been Teaching Me Lately 

              

With such a sentimental month in my rear view mirror, I kept thinking of how powerful memory is and what a gift it is. It reminded me of something I learned from one of my favorite C.S. Lewis books, Out of the Silent Planet.
 
Lewis begins his tale by introducing the main character, a philologist named Elwin Ransom, who is taking a walking tour of the English countryside. On his journey, he runs into some shady characters from his university days. After dinner, conversation and a few drinks, Ransom is terrified when he realizes he's been hoodwinked by his former colleagues. He wakes up, astonished to find himself in a metal ball soaring through the light-filled heavens, on his way to another world.

When the spacecraft sets down on a foreign planet called Malacandra, Ransom is introduced to a new culture and new perspectives. One such perspective embraces the unique power and significance of remembering. A friendly Malacandran alien later describes his first encounter with Ransom:

When you and I met, the meeting was over very shortly. It was nothing. Now, it is growing something as we remember it. But still we know very little about it. What it will be when I remember it as I lie down to die, what it makes in me all my days till then - that is the real meeting. The other is only the beginning of it. 

I love that thought! And it's not as alien as you might think.

Oscar Levant acknowledged, "Happiness isn't something you experience; it's something you remember." The real power of any moment is fully realized when it is remembered. The experience might have been painful or pleasant, but its intensity and meaning grow when we remember and reflect upon it.

For me, the wedding of Clayton and Caroline was a sweet moment in time, and it will grow within me an even sweeter memory. I just love that! 

Well, that's what's been percolating in me lately.  

May 2012 Spill the Beans

 

You Ask It, I'll Answer It  

Question:

I wanted to ask for your input and guidance, if you don't mind sharing. I am speaking at a women's event and am working on preparing for that.

This is my first teaching opportunity, so it's new territory for me. When you are preparing a new talk, what are your practices?  I'm unsure where to start.
 
Sherry G.
Tennessee  

  

Answer:

I always try to know a lot more about a topic than I actually share. What I mean is, I research, think, meditate and feel like I really grasp something before I teach it.

I like to say I carry it around in my head and heart a long time before it ever escapes my lips! The temptation then is to teach all you learned.  An audience needs to know less than you prepared. So, the procedure is to "select," not "compress." My temptation is to compress all 40 hours of research and thought into 40 minutes of presentation. Bad idea. Rather, the best choice is to select out the main principles for the audience.

Once that is selected, you "show" before you "tell." Just like Jesus taught by story, if we do the same, people can see the picture which will remind them of the truth. Once you show, you can then tell by expounding or deepening the concept. If you compress info, you can't show them - there would be no time and they wouldn't remember. They would have information overload.

I learned a long time ago to really ask myself, "What is the one thing I want them to take away from this message?" When I discover that "one thing," it makes the selecting process easier. It's better to hit one nail three times than to hit three nails one time. Most audiences are "one nail" listeners. So, find out what your "one nail" take-away is and select your points based on that. Then you can hit them three times from different angles!

Last thought, care about your audience as much as, if not more than, your message. A brilliant message presented with little regard for the listener falls flat. An audience will scoop up every piece of your flawed presentation if they know you empathize and love them.

Okay, really last thought, give your listeners a "value statement." Give them something they can do, remember or implement based on your teaching. Inspiration will fade, but equipping them with something they can do to walk out their inspiration will give legs to your message. That way, it will spread far beyond your immediate audience and give life too many.

Hope this helps. Now, if you get in His Word and on your knees, you will stand before women with something to say!

 
And now the beans are officially spilled.

  

  

 

  

Got a question? I might just spill the beans.  

April 2012 Taste This!

What I Am In To Lately

March ended and April began in Lima, Ohio. It was our second year with those wonderful women, and again, we had a wonderful time! This year, Kathy Troccoli and Carl Herrgesell made the perfect blend.

I tried to keep our travel/ministry calendar as sparse as possible in April so we would have plenty of time to enjoy preparing for the wedding. Part of that planning is the rehearsal dinner. I could have just used flowers, but when I priced them, I thought I could go to Hobby Lobby and own some cool stuff for the same amount of money I would have spent on something that would have drooped and died within days!  Don't you just love Hobby Lobby? They constantly discount their items, so the rehearsal dinner has been financed at 50% off!  

So, here's the plan...each table will have a centerpiece featuring an old
small decorative trunk. The trunk is open with a tall glass candle holder in it that rises above the top of the open lid. The glass candle holder has a coffee scented candle in it. Surrounding the trunk are clear and champagne-colored rocks scattered about with occasional coffee beans mixed in. Ivy gracefully flows from the trunk and intermittently placed around the trunk are old family pictures, 3-5 photos in frames, depending on the size of the trunk. Make sense? I know a picture is worth a thousand words, but I'm doing my best here to let you see it with words!  Next month, I will have lots of pics for you!  

The goal is to make it have a vintage coffee shop feel. Clayton and Caroline's favorite thing is to go to coffee shops. They love coffee, so the theme is perfect for them! But, what to do about the frames? Even at 50% off, we needed too many, so we dug out all our old frames that are no longer in style and decided to make them shabby chic. Our friends went in their closets and under their beds to dig out their old frames, and we met at our home with sandpaper, screws, spray paint and an adventurous spirit! It was so fun seeing two professors, a banker, a dental hygienist, a school teacher and a blind author trying to be Martha Stewart!

Anyway, we banged them, scraped them and sanded them, and the result looks like something you would buy at Pottery Barn!  And, it was fun! Here's a sneak peek.

Video: The Frame Project

The final centerpiece display.

During all the pre-wedding hoopla, I started reading a very interesting book called Sacred Pathways. In it, author Gary Thomas explores nine different paths we tend to take as we relate to and worship God.  In the opening chapter, he explains these are similar to personality temperaments. It is not an identical comparison, but, just as we each have different personality temperaments and live out our lives and passions in various forms, so do we have a "spiritual temperament." Our spiritual temperament is our sacred pathway - it is the way we most naturally respond to God in worship and prayer. Because in Christianity, some tend to prescribe the "one" way to pray or the "one" way to do a quiet time, I am finding this book very helpful to understand why "one" size doesn't fit all. So far, it is very scriptural and he uses lots of Biblical examples. The second half of the book dives into each pathway and offers a quiz to help you identify which you best fit into. I will let you know what I discover. You may want to give it a taste test, too!

Well, I'm off to make a list, wrap something, mail something, clean something...and do a million other things to get ready for the big nuptials!

So, give these things a taste test:

1.  Fresh Grounded Faith near you

2.  Give your old frames a vintage new look
 
3.  Sacred Pathways by Gary Thomas

April 2012 Fresh Grounded Thoughts

What God Has Been Teaching Me Lately 

Why Judy Likes Storms             

My neighbor, Judy, has a room in her home that features striking photographs of storms. Paris, Milan, Montego Bay...all places where majestic, beautiful storms were captured on film. As she described each photograph to me, I became curious as to why she chose storms as her décor. I asked her why she collected such interesting art. "I love storms," she said.  

"What do you love about storms?" I asked. After all, I thought, "I guess they're beautiful, but they're also mammoth, intimidating and sometimes fierce." I thought it was an unusual thing to have such an interest in. Her answer struck me as profound - "They remind me of the presence of God."

I have never thought of a storm in that way. Have you? When you look at the photo gallery of storms hanging on the walls of your memory, do they remind you of God's presence?  

God's presence is beautiful like a storm. God's presence is mammoth like a storm. God's presence can be intimidating like a storm.  God's Holy presence is also fierce, just like a storm.  

I bet the disciples who were on the Sea of Galilee that day in Mark 4 never thought of a storm the same way. I bet every time the wind blew hard or the lightening clapped, they remembered that day in the boat with Jesus when the winds were strong and their faith was weak. How could a storm remind them of anything but the presence of God? Storms had to remind them of Jesus, for He was with them. In the storm was His presence. His compassion was beautiful. His authority was mammoth.  His words were intimidating. His command of the elements that bowed at his speech was fierce. When you think about it, what is more intimidating - a storm or one who harnesses the storm with His word?   

A storm should remind us of His presence. If we can see Him in our storm, it can make it beautiful. It can become a place of reverence and awe. Even if you don't sense His presence in calming the storm, His presence will be inexplicably known as He calms your heart. 

Well, that's what's been percolating in me lately.  

 

April 2012 Spill the Beans

   

You Ask It, I'll Answer It  

Question:

 

Hi Jennifer,
I have admired your wonderful outlook with a disability, and that it does not hinder your walk with others or with God personally. I led a Bible study in my home with many ladies using your video studies. They were so wonderful. Now I am experiencing something new. I was recently diagnosed with spasmodic dysphonia, a rare vocal disorder that inhibits my speech. I am not able to speak. This is a great hindrance to my daily life. I'm just trying to cope with it and thought I would write to you for any advice you may have for me, as I now also have a disability.
 
Delisa   

  

Answer:

Hi Delisa,
I'm so sorry to hear of this new difficulty you are facing! Oh girl, I don't have any profound advice.... I just walk by faith and trust God more than my feelings when it comes to this kind of thing.

The main thing that came to mind when I asked God for any specific word for you was this - be patient with yourself and be patient with God. He will grant you grace for your present moment, so don't worry about your future or pine away for the past.  

He will carry you through this....

Keep trusting, sister.

Jennifer
 
And now the beans are officially spilled.

  

  

 

March 2012 Taste This!

What I Am In To Lately

March opened with the filming of my Missing Pieces Bible Study. I can't even put into words how grateful I am for what God did. And, I cannot put into words how grateful I am that it is...OVER! Ha! (Relief is my favorite emotion!) I am incredibly grateful for the hundreds of ladies who came each night and were so supportive as the audience. If you want to see some behind the scenes pictures, check in here.

The following weekend after filming, I gave a "Honeymoon Tea" for Caroline and Clayton. They are getting married on May 18 - less than 2 months away! I sent invitations that included a white tea sachet and asked the ladies attending to fill it with a little cash for the honeymoon. When the ladies arrived, they placed their "tea bag" in a tea pot which Caroline took home. We used my great aunt's silver service and lots of tea cups from friends and family. It was such a sweet time. I made crustless quiche and chocolate croissants. But, the best part of the menu was the blueberry scones we got from Hebrews Coffee. I have never tasted better scones! Anyway, it was a special time and an easy kind of shower both for the host and the guests - no shopping or wrapping or games! Yeehaw!  If you want to see the video I sent Clayton from the tea, click here. 

The teas I served were Good Earth Original Sweet and Spicy, Bigelow Plantation Mint, PG Tips and Tazo Zen Green Tea. One of the CD's I played during the tea was Kathy Troccoli's Heartsongs. My favorite song on that CD is "What a Wonderful World."  In fact, Clayton and I chose that song to dance to at the reception! I look forward to that, but to be honest, I'm not the most confident dancer, so I look forward to that being over, too! (Remember...relief is my favorite emotion!) Ha! Seriously, it will be so special and I love dancing with my men, though. Actually, Phil and I are taking lessons...and that's a whole other drama I will tell you about later!

Well, that's all.

So, give these things a taste test:

1. Check out Missing Pieces: Real Hope When Life Doesn't Make Sense.  August 1, 2012 release.

2. Give a "Honeymoon Tea" for your next bride-to-be.

3. Blueberry scones from Hebrews Coffee.

4. My favorite teas listed above.

5. Kathy Troccoli's Heartsongs CD.

March 2012 Fresh Grounded Thoughts

What God Has Been Teaching Me Lately

Miserable-ites           

I sat in a coffee shop recently and overheard the ladies at the table near me deep in conversation. The shop was small and they were loud, so I could hear every negative and complaining word they spoke. One was obsessed with how her husband didn't measure up to her standards; the other was consumed with bitterness over a boss who seemingly didn't value her as she thought proper. It struck me that they were both miserable within great provision. One was married, provided for financially and emotionally. The other was employed, provided with security and income. Yet, both were miserable and discontent with the portion they had.
 
They were much like the Israelites in the wilderness, or as I like to call them...The "Miserable-ites!"
 
In Exodus 16:3 the Israelites were in the wilderness hungry and grumbly.  "Would that we have died by the Lord's hand in Egypt, when we sat by pots of meat and ate bread till we were full."
 
God responded, saying, "I will rain bread from heaven and the Israelites will go out and gather a day's portion each day. " (vs. 4) In other words, God provided them manna.  But, that wasn't good enough.
 
The people cried, "Who will give us meat to eat? We remember the fish we used to eat free in Egypt... the cucumbers, melons, leaks, onions and garlic. But now our appetite is gone. There is nothing at all." (Numbers 11:4-6)

The Israelites continued to complain about the lack of meat. They complained they had nothing to eat but manna. It was as if they said, "God, all we have is what you provided."
 
Rescued from Egypt, daily provided for, yet utterly miserable? They were surrounded with God's provision, but they were miserable because they didn't receive it. They may have physically digested it, but they didn't take it in, acknowledge it for what it was - God's kindness and grace.  

Just like the ladies in the coffee shop, they were consumed with an ample portion of misery, bitterness and a myriad of other emotions. It wasn't because God had not provided; it was because they had not consumed His provision.
 
We, too, can become miserable when we don't acknowledge God's provision whether it is in a job or a marriage. Instead of consuming the manna/grace He provides, we become consumed with our own lack. We don't notice His faithfulness.  

Lamentations 3:22-24 says, "Because of the LORD's great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness. I say to myself, "The LORD is my portion; therefore I will wait for Him."
 
When we "consume" the portion of grace God gives us, we will not be consumed by anything but gratefulness. I don't know about you, but I want to focus on God's provision, not the imperfection of others or the flavor of the manna he provides. Enough said.

Well, that's what's been percolating in me lately.

March 2012 Spill the Beans

You Ask It, I'll Answer It  

Question:

Jennifer,

Recently, I completed your study on Me, Myself and Lies and just read Lessons I Learned in the Dark.

I am going through a very difficult time in my life. I'm in my 60's and I was probably deaf since birth, but no one knew! My family never really said anything about it, so I went through school not knowing. (Amazing how the other senses kick in.) I learned to compensate.

I depend on reading lips and anyone behind me has freedom to talk behind my back. I sat in a Precepts Bible Study and asked, "Please repeat anything anyone else says and the right answers." The response, "Well, if there is anything you don't hear, let me know." Hello! Teacher talking into a black board does not give me "hearing."  (I no longer attend the studies.)

So obviously, I have an anger problem. After all these years you'd think I'd come to acceptance. Actually, when I first learned what the implication of my hearing loss was at the age of 40, I said, "Well, they didn't know," but today, I'm mad.

I read stories like yours that had parents who were tuned in to their child's needs. People like yourself who have testimonies of loving, caring parents who walked through those beginning years of awareness.

So often, I feel so left out, and I know there is a time I'm just going to have to accept the loss and the implications. I'm angry and no one seems to understand. I recently spoke to a young pastor who has a hearing loss. His response to one of my dilemmas was, "If you figure it out, let me know."

Now that I've written what I have, I ask why. I loved your book. I laughed, identified with your pain and cried. I guess I just need some encouragement. Thanks for listening.

 

Julianna  

 

Answer:

Oh Sweet Julianna,

I get it! It stinks and you're stuck with it. I am sorry you have to deal with this. But, I know you can, and within it and even in spite of it, you can be free. I think people's lack of responsiveness and the isolation you feel is worse than the hearing loss itself.  

So, here is my encouragement. From one sister to another, being angry is only hurting you. I don't want you to be hurt any longer. Episodes of frustration are legit, but clothing yourself in anger is more damaging than hearing loss and people's lack of understanding. I want you to be free from what is hurting you most. Evidently, God has a purpose for your deafness. I know the purpose is not for you to be locked up in anger and unforgiveness toward your parents. So, can you ask God for the grace to let go of anger? He will give it to you.
 
To be in your 60's is great. You have walked many miles and have wisdom to offer others. None of us ever really figure it all out. We just trust, walk humbly and choose to laugh at what we can! We can't control blindness or deafness, but we can control our attitudes. So, sister...ask God for grace, receive it and then give it to those who hurt you.

I believe in His ability, I believe in you and I believe in Him in you!

Now, go and live free.

Jennifer
 
And now the beans are officially spilled.

January 2012 Taste This!

What I Am In To Lately

I love January. It's usually a snuggly month to regroup after Christmas and prepare for a great new year.  This January was no exception (with the exception of a lumpectomy which I'll tell you about in Fresh Grounded Thoughts).  Our Christmas was wonderful.  We flew to my folks' home in Florida on Christmas afternoon.  We also got to spend a whole day with all of Phil's family who had gathered in Tampa.  We loved being with our families, and of course, I had a Cuban sandwich and plantains at my favorite Dade City restaurant, A Matter of Taste.  I don't know where you live, but if you've never had a good Cuban sandwich and plantains, you simply must find some and give them a taste test!  They are "muy delicioso!"
 
My favorite chocolate for this month is Ghirardelli Dark Chocolate Truffles.  Oh girl, one creamy bite makes my endorphins do a happy dance.  So far, it is my very favorite Ghirardelli.
 
Lastly, I'm reading the Ted Dekker Circle Series which includes the books titled Black, Red, White and Green.  It's very different from anything I've read before.  Sometimes a little too testerone-ish for me, but I keep reading because it's like putting together a puzzle - I just can't stop until the last piece is in place!  Sometimes I think Ted Dekker has been influenced by C.S. Lewis fantasies, and other times I think he's just wildly creative, teeming with originality.
 
Anyway, this series is a fantasy with some metaphorical snapshots of the contrast between good and evil and the Christian message of redemption. Give it a taste test...I'd love your opinion.

Well sister, February is a short month. Let's make it count!

Give these things a Taste Test:

1.  A Cuban sandwich and some yummy plantains

2.  Ghirardelli Dark Chocolate Truffles

3.  Ted Dekker's Circle Series